V-Day

13 Feb. 06

Dear friends & family,

I've branched out from getting letters in TimeOut Chicago and am now being published in the Trib (okay, okay, its free subsidiary). This is what happens when you read the RedEye on the commute to work...

Yes, yours truly is one of four finalists in the RedEye's "Funniest Break-Up Story" contest. It's not particularly amusing, but it was the best I could do in 100 words or less. Look for it in tomorrow's paper!

Love, Theresa

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I shouldn't have gone to Mexico. Before I left for a short vacation with a friend, everything was going swimmingly. So well, in fact, that I should have realized it was too good to be true. Really, who gives someone a bicycle on their third date? And refers to you as their girlfriend by date #5? When I got back, everything was different. He was difficult to get ahold of; kept postponing plans. Finally I heard from him: "Hi, it's me.You're probably thinking what I'm thinking... it's not going to work out. So so long, have a great life, and it was nice knowing you." The best part? It was a voicemail.

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I won VIP bottle service at Funky Buddha Lounge, a nightclub not too far away from where I live. Anyone care to avail themselves of my prize?